Men Who Hate Women is a fascinating, mind-blowing and deeply intelligent book that should be recommend reading for every person on our planet.

Those most powerfully reinforcing rigid and patriarchal gender stereotypes are suffocating those who most need to escape them. Perhaps you think that there might be one or two men online with wild opinions and worrying views about women, but that’s just the internet – they’re just sad teenagers sitting in their parents’ basements, whiling away the hours in a pair of grubby Y-fronts, clutching a packet of Doritos under one arm. When we are children our families take care of our basic survival needs; they are also our first and most important sources of information about the world. Maybe you’ve heard that freedom of speech is under threat and, if millennial snowflakes and PC warriors are allowed to have their way, nobody will ever be able to say anything critical about women or minority groups on the internet again.

What makes a woman vulnerable to mistreatment at home, no matter how well she functions outside, is the belief that her need for her partner's love is the most important thing in her life. But in the misogynist relationship, the power struggle is constant, and he always wants to win and control. Some other passages were pure “psychologizing” and “psychoanalyzing”, and in my opinion lowered the quality of an otherwise excellent book. Men themselves were the real victims, they’d tell me, in a society in which political correctness has gone mad, white men are persecuted, and so many women lie about rape. He decided I’d tipped the cabdriver too much and started screaming at me in the middle of the street.

Yet we raise few such objections when the crimes of a man with brown or black skin are immediately assumed to be related to his race or religion.

She details the way much of MRA/PUA/Incel ideology has moved into the mainstream, using tactics familiar from watching the Alt-Right. The messages we receive as children become the core information we use about ourselves and our position in the world for the rest of our lives.

I understand I can change my preference through my account settings or unsubscribe directly from any marketing communications at any time. If the misogynist feels his partner is betraying him for the sake of the children, he may begin to attack her adequacy as a mother. Therefore, only those friends and family members that support his view of himself or his version of reality will be welcome in your lives. A rejecting mother who makes him feel bad for his needs teaches him that it’s never OK to be vulnerable, and that his needs are shameful and unacceptable. Once she believes his version of the relationship—that he is "good" and she is "bad," that he is "right" and she is "wrong," that her deficiencies are the cause of his blow-ups, and that he is acting this way only because he is trying to help her become a better person—she has stepped into a dangerous twilight zone of distorted perceptions.It has to be cleverer than that, because the only way it can become so wildly, phenomenally successful, the only way it can be so cleverly camouflaged as to be almost undetectable, is if its arteries creep outwards from that black heart of violent hate, wending their way through online pathways and webbing out across social media platforms, splitting and dividing into finer and finer capillaries, infiltrating chatrooms, reaching out through message boards, sniffing tentatively at the air and taking the leap out of the dank realms of the internet altogether, slithering offline, penetrating our pubs and sliding around street corners, twirling delicately up the wooden legs of kitchen tables, peeping into corridors of power, burrowing into institutions and workplaces, fanning out tendrils across talk shows and newsrooms, taking deeper and deeper root until they’re part of the very fabric of our shared consciousness. No missing or damaged pages, no creases or tears, no underlining or highlighting of text, and no writing in the margins. He couldn’t stand to spend time with her family because they were such “uncultured, ignorant people.

A community that actively recruits members who might have very real problems and vulnerabilities, and tells them that women are the cause of all their woes. As an adult he expected women to meet his desperate need to be mothered in a way he never was as a child. To question why some men behave in certain ways is viewed as an assault on all men, and thus unacceptable.

Because allowing the manosphere to remain shrouded in shadows lends a different kind of legitimacy – that of the scrappy, underdog outsider. Men Going Their Own Way like to hang out with other men going the same way on forums or YouTube, where they happily converse for hours and pages about exactly the thing they are supposedly pledged to avoid. En mor som sätter värde på sonens strävan efter oberoende och uppmuntrar honom att skiljas från henne när han behöver det ger honom mycket viktiga verktyg för att handskas med livet.